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Tag Archives: marriage
It’s like torture… but without the torture…
Could NOT get to sleep last night. My mind took that opportunity to wander all over the fraking place. 1:26am… wide awake… fanfreakingtastic… 1:35am… look at hubby sleeping soundly… that’s so fucking annoying… 1:36am… is he snoring!?! Oh come on! … Continue reading
Has Star Trek taught us NOTHING!?!?!?
Well civil war broke out in our house last night, and for once it was NOT my fault … well not really… well kind of … well shit. Okay it started with my sister in law posting a video of … Continue reading
I give you… THE EVIDENCE!!!
Woke up this morning and before I even had a chance to make the elixir of life aka coffee, I stepped on something disturbing on our living room floor… and this time, it wasn’t CIA Cat’s fault. I quickly emailed … Continue reading
The only person that can hurt me, is me… seriously.
I’m not being all Freudian with that title, I’m just speaking the truth, the hard truth, the hard truth I learned this weekend. Started when Hubby and I went to Costco… on a Sunday… during snack time… while it was … Continue reading
Getting to know you, getting to know all about… HOLY SH%&!
So Hubby and I have been in our apartment for about 2 months now and I’m making a point to get to know all of our neighbors. Me: Babe, I just met our neighbors Mark and Carl, I think they’re … Continue reading
He Started it with Torture, I ended it with a Gas Bomb
So I learned some hard truths tonight people… HARD TRUTHS!
It all began while I was sitting at Hubby’s desk, exploring the wonder and awesomeness of China Ebay. I know China is a pretty bad country when it comes to human rights and pollution control, but MY GOD can those people offer sparkly shiny things for low, low prices and FREE SHIPPING!!
*phew* sorry, I do tend to get a little carried away when it comes to sparkly things… hence my last purchase… I just couldn’t decide between tiara or headband… so I got both! … too subtle?
Anywho, while drooling over the new line of cyrstal encrusted nose warmers, Hubby came up to the desk, pushed me aside, got down on his knees, and stuck his head under the desk…
Me: Well Hello Sailor!
Hubby: (muffled) What?
Me: Watchya doing down there honey?
Hubby: (still muffled) I gotta swap out one of the wall cords… something… something… tech talk… nerdyness… blah.
Okay that’s not exactly what he said but it was getting boring so I zoned out and continued with my bling extravaganza shopping.
Hubby: ggahhh mig ed duck.
Me: Ya don’t say.
Hubby: MMMAAAHHHH IZ STUG!
Me: Totally
Hubby: BABE!
Me: yo
Hubby: MY HEAD IS STUCK!
Me:… it is not
Hubby: I think my hair is stuck on a screw
Me:… really?… Okay what’s the last post you read from my blog.
Hubby: What? I don’t know? The dude one?
Me: WHAT! That was MONTHS ago!!! Okay… time to catch up. April 17th It was a cold day and Hubby and I…
Hubby: OH COME ON! This is Torture!!!…
Me:…
Hubby:… babe… where are you going?
Me:… bed… good luck with all that down there.
Hubby: Babe!… Babe?… BABE!
Me:… I’m back.
Hubby: Thanks hon, are you going to help me know?
Me: No
Hubby: Then why did you come back!??
Me: I just ate 2 slices of your pepperone pizza.
Hubby: You can’t eat peppperoni, it makes you… OH BABE!
Me: Welcome to War.
Death by Bacon… not as cool as you would think.
So Hubby and I stopped for a “quick” “bite” yesterday. It’s wasn’t quick… and most definitely was NOT a bite. I give you… Hubby’s burger. Me: BABE! Hubby: What? Me: That’s a walking heart attack! Hubby: No, it’s the Boogy … Continue reading
If you don’t hear from me tomorrow, I’m in jail… but I’m sure it was totally worth it.
Well the inevitable has happened, I’ve been picked for Jury Duty. THIS IS OUTRAGIOUS! I had a 5 year streak going of not receiving a jury duty notice. I actually believed someone had dropped my file behind a filing cabinet where … Continue reading
Free ice cream… it’s a bitch.
So my work decided to be awesome and gave us a summer treat which included all the makings for sundaes. Not wanting to take the chance of someone grabbing my box of delicious awesomeness before I got home, I … Continue reading
Posted in Humor
Tagged free, Humor, ice cream, laugh, life, marriage, out of shape, owe, pain, sweat, the horror
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But That's For Another Blog 