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Tag Archives: funny
Sometimes you just need a friend to call you a filthy whore.
So I made the classic mistake of inviting people to my house. It’s not that I don’t like people, I LOVE people. I love feeding people and making them drink absurd amounts of wine, all the while making them go … Continue reading
How hair curlers ended my sex life.
Hubby: oh my god, what is that? Me: What’s what? Hubby: That!! (pointing at my head) Me: Hair curlers! I just got them, it says I just roll my hair up at night and I awaken to lustrous, bouncing curls. … Continue reading
I Give You The Greatest Email You Will EVER Get From An IT Department
So we just got this office wide email from our IT department, which consists of 2 guys, and it’s fucking brilliant. Don’t just take my word for it, read the email yourself: Hey Kids, Over the weekend Alex and I changed … Continue reading
Emmy was hit by a garbage truck… I was struck blind… and everyone laughed… bastards.
SO, a girl I work with was in a fender bender yesterday, and today, everyone was sharing car accident stories with her to make her feel better. After I finished telling my horribly sad story, everyone was laughing… bastards… here’s the … Continue reading
What do you do after getting skin cancer and having reconstructive surgery… GO BUY A FUCKING CONVERTIBLE… SCREW YOU SUN!!!
Ya… so my nose is still healing after having plastic surgery to cover the hole that my skin cancer removal left… and I just bought a convertible… SHUT UP! I know what you’re thinking… oh and did I forget to … Continue reading
Don’t question my love dammit… Someone hand me a fork!!
Is that not the most confusing title ever!?! I had a MUCH better one, but it was also the final line of this post and I felt like that was having your desert before your meal… which also totally goes with this … Continue reading
American Express and US Airways… WHY YOU NO WORK TOGETHER!?!?
I just had the most amazing 3 way phone conversation with 2 woman that wanted to KILL each other, and it wasn’t a hi-techy 3 way with one phone, no I did it old school with 2 phones! One on the right … Continue reading
A photo montage of skin cancer healing… the only real reason to take selfies… FINALLY THERE’S A REASON!!!!
Well my plastic surgery was done 2 months ago and now all bandages are off and healing is going strong!! It was a pretty weird procedure, especially since the doctor decided that I had the “right stuff” and didn’t need … Continue reading
Emma Stone, Spice Girls, and Your Dog Pooping on Your Pillow… it’s that kind of Friday.
So my good friend Emma is a HUGE Spice Girls Fan… seriously… she will lose her shit the minute a Spice Girl song comes on. Doesn’t matter where we are, it could be at a club, in a car, at … Continue reading
The Puppuccino… IT’S REAL!!!!
So like every other woman in the world, YES, I’m using ‘world’ now as I’m absolutely positive that every woman in the world…. is on Pinterest. I have the following image on my Pinterest page titled “I’M TOTALLY GOING TO … Continue reading
But That's For Another Blog 